A Visit from the Missionaries
I just wanted to sit down for a few minutes and record some of my thoughts. Two of the missionaries just dropped by the house today, and we had a good discussion.
The two young men were both around 20 years of age, and were good guys. I greeted them warmly and invited them in for a chat. I didn’t want to deceive them in any way, so I immediately told them that I used to be a member of the Church, and I asked them if that would bother them. They were Ok with it. So, we all three sat down for a chat.
We talked together for about an hour. I shared with them the fact that I had actually been in the same room with President Gordon B. Hinckley, and they thought that was cool. We talked about his recent passing and his contributions to the Church.
I allowed the conversation to go fairly deep, but I purposely avoided discussion of any of the really troubling things about the Church. In a way, I’ve always felt well-disposed towards these guys. They have it pretty rough. They’re away from their families, they live on the bare minimum the Church will allow, they have very strict rules of behavior, and so on.
Because of that, I’m always very hesitant to bombard them with “fun facts about the Church.” I sometimes wonder if it is my place to introduce them to the way the world really is. It’s a big responsibility — at least in my eyes. Attempting to shatter someone else’s world view should never be taken lightly.
So we talked. I told them about how I used to be a faithful member for 23 years or so, and that I came to a point where there were just too many questions without satisfactory answers. They listened well.
Then they would share their testimonies with me and read from the Book of Mormon. None of this was new to me, of course. In fact, they sounded just like me about 20 years ago. They just stressed that you had to have faith, and that I needed to rebuild my testimony.
I told them that, if there was one principle that I had learned from all my studies, it was this: Truth can withstand scrutiny. I urged them to think about it themselves. If something is really true, we ought to be able to tear it to pieces and look and every little part, and still remain convinved of its truthfulness.
I pointed out that, as far as I could tell, most all religions (not just Mormonism) actually discourage this principle. Most teach that you must have faith, and that to question some of their teachings — such as the existence of God, the divinity of Jesus, or the authority of their scriptures — is tantamount to heresy.
I related the story of Galileo and his run-in with the Catholic Church. He tried to convince the Church leaders that the earth was actually not the center of the universe. He held up his telescope and asked them to look for themselves. Instead, they said they didn’t need to because they already knew the truth.
Science, on the other hand, behaves in just the opposite way. Scientists encourage the scrutiny of their work. If there are flaws, they want them to be found. Their’s is (or certainly should be) the pursuit of truth. Religions, for the most part, however, simply seek to perpetuate their dogma.
In rather characteristic fashion, they told me that the reason I had “lost” my testimony of the “Gospel” was because Satan had led me away from “the truth.” I had forgotten how narrow my thinking used to be when I was a member of the Church. I later found out that this is just a mind control technique that leaders employ in order to keep members in line.
They asked me if I used to be “happy” when I was a member of the Church. I told them that, Yes, for about the first ten years or so, I felt very satisfied with my membership. But I used this opportunity to make a point. I told them that, at this point in my life, I had come to the conclusion that just because something makes you “feel good” or makes you “happy” does not indicate that it is true. I simply refuse to use my “feel good” indicator to test for truth.
As a matter of fact, I’ve found that very often, just the opposite is true. As Gloria Steinem put it: “The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off.”
They read to me from their 1981 edition of the Book of Mormon,and I told them that I had a replica of the original 1830 edition in my library. They thought that was cool. I decided not to tell them that over 3,000 changes had been made to the book that Joseph Smith had “translated” by “the gift and power of God.” I decided to save that for another time.
Anyway, it was a nice visit, and no ill feelings were manifest from anyone. I allowed one of the guys to offer a short prayer, and I invited them to return if they actually desire to hear some of the issues that I have with the Church.
I don’t know, but they may actually come back.
My only hope is that I may help them to begin an honest pursuit of truth….
… not necessarily just the pursuit of happiness.
Postscript
As of today (July 15, 2008), they have not returned.